TookietheCookie

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Scared to breathe by TookietheCookie, literature

Literature

Scared to breathe

Scared to breathe The scars on my wrist speak for themselves. They tell you about pain and hate and rejection and how desperate I am. They show you everything I am and everything I'm not, everything I wanna be and everything I never wanted to be. They make you see that I am broken and sad. They are the evidence that I'm scared to live. Scared to ask for help. Scared to breathe. And all the time, I'm afraid of what life can do to me. The scars show my past, my presence and my future, if there is one. I'm scared of people, because they can hurt me so easily. I'm afraid to sleep, because there could be horrible nightmares haunting me, again.

Why do I rest? by TookietheCookie, literature

Literature

Why do I rest?

I wanna leave, I wanna go I don't wanna stay, don't wanna rest So sick of this life, 'cause I'm not moving There's nothing left, nothing to hold onto Is there anything at all? Anything it's worth living for? I'm shaking, I'm breaking And I don't see a reason to stay Why's everything just worthless No matter what I do No matter what I say It doesn't mean anything So why do I rest in this world? Everyone's just trying to break me And no one will help me 'Cause in this world no one cares People are cold these days That's why I feel so bad Feel everything, but nothing And I can't feel myself anymore I just wanna run away I'm

Just die. by TookietheCookie, literature

Literature

Just die.

Die. Die. Die. Just die. I watch myself in the mirror: A pale face; blank, emotionless. Eyebrows. Two staring, gazing eyes of a long faded colour. Nose. A pair of once red lips; pressed together. Ears. Every detail or rather not-detail framed by long hair that used to be brown, but which now seems to be of a strange grey colour. Boring. Expressionless. I think about my feelings: Hatred. Desperation. Shame. Hatred. Loneliness. Emptiness. Hatred. Aversion. Disapproval. Hatred. I watch myself in the mirror: A red face; furious. Eyebrows. Two eyes, full of hate. Nose. A pair of lips; exposing teeth, pressed against eac

Tod? by TookietheCookie, literature

untitled one... by TookietheCookie, literature

Literature

untitled one...

What is a life worth? For what purpose did the man invent the sword? Which significance has love? Why are there thieves? Why is there money? And why is it worth more than a hero? When does life come to an end? Who determines someone as a legend? Why does the earth turn? Does even one live without complaint? What did the time originate from? And who is really ready for death? Who may decide over lives? Why must we scale mountains? For what reason are there always several ways? Who puts animals in enclosures? Which meaning has the heart? And why does it carry so much pain? Do cats really have seven lives? What shall we strive

I'm fine IV by TookietheCookie, literature

Literature

I'm fine IV

I'm fine IV My best friend sits on my bed, plays with a biro and watches me while I sit in front of my computer and try to decide which music to listen to. I give up. I can't decide. >>What kind of music?Umm…dunno. Just something. It doesn't matter.>As you wish.Why? For what reason?>No reason.>Huh? Didn't you talk to her?>Lee!>It's okay, Lee.>It's not.This is so unfair. You know…she just told me she doesn't want to see me anymore. I don't even know why. I phoned her like a thousand times, but she doesn't answer the phone…I don't know what to do.

I'm fine III by TookietheCookie, literature

Literature

I'm fine III

I'm fine III I'm happy. I think I'm in love. I look up to him; thoughtful. I feel my heartbeat fastening. He's so much older…it's a strange feeling, but the age doesn't stop me liking him. He's 29…I'm 17. No, I don't care. No. It doesn't make any difference. I hope he doesn't care… I touch his hand and press it slightly. He smiles happily and bends down to kiss my cheek. >>Let's go in.I'm sorry, dear, but I gotta go now.>Bye.Bye.

I'm fine II by TookietheCookie, literature

Literature

I'm fine II

I'm fine II I can't live with it. I can't. The truth hurts so much. How can I ever live with what happened back then? It has been two years now…two years of suffering. I'm broken, and I will always be, because no one can ever heal this wound. It's too deep and it hurts too much…and it still bleeds. People are so blind. I am hurt, but no one can see. There's a big black hole of pain inside me. My pride, my heart and my soul…broken and lost. Help me. I cry a thousand tears, but the pain doesn't decrease. I want it to end. How can it still hurt after two years? Things went back to normal, a year ago already, but the past is

I'm fine I by TookietheCookie, literature

Literature

I'm fine I

I'm fine I I lie in my bed, but I can't sleep. It's dark in my room, because clouds cover the full moon and swallow its light. I'm glad they do, because I hate the moon. Especially a full moon. And I hate the stars and – above all – the sun. I hate summer and spring, because they're so sunny. I hate sunny days. My favourite season is winter. It's cold, but there aren't so many sunny days. But I hate snow. Unfortunately we often have snow. But fall is also disgusting. I hate it. There are still too many sunny days and the trees look oh so bright and golden. At least they lose their leaves. I like trees more when they're bare. Bu

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Scared to breathe by TookietheCookie, literature

Literature

Scared to breathe

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untitled one... by TookietheCookie, literature

Literature

untitled one...

TookietheCookie

About TookietheCookie

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Germany
Deviant for 14 years
She / Her

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TookietheCookie

Jul 4, 2010

Devious Journal Entry

0 min read

oh my, it's so long since i've been here the last time... i'm sorry ^^; i feel kinda bad now :( and i miss someone really much.. :/ need to post some new stuff. probably need to share some thoughts with u..^^

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TookietheCookie

Mar 28, 2010

happy.

0 min read

So this were the German Archery Championchips. First of all: it was so GREAT and such a wonderful experience! I'm very proud of my mates of the youth group and of our coach and of myself as well. Yeah, well, there was only one other girl who shot in the same class as I did, and without shame I say that she was way better, but I bet she has been shooting for a much longer time than me. So I got the second place, a certificate and a silver medal and I'm very happy about that. There were 120 arrows to shoot and in total, I had 434 points of possible 600. Saturday I shot 213 points, 102 in the first passage, and 111 in the second. Sunday I s

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TookietheCookie

Mar 24, 2010

!!

0 min read

So this weekend there are the German Archery Championships. Well, I won't win anything I guess, but I'll definitely give my best :nod:! The only thing I don't like about it is that I have to get up at 4:20 a.m. on saturday (10:20 on sunday). Oh I can't wait, but I swear, I am sooooooo bloody nervous. Wish me luck, please? :aww: Yeah, and you should check out wavepanther71's page (http://wavepanther71.deviantart.com/)! You'll find some awesome photos like these: http://wavepanther71.deviantart.com/art/On-the-edge-of-the-world-107439050 ,  http://wavepanther71.deviantart.com/art/The-golden-eye-114313294 ,  http://wavepanther71.deviantart